Sawyer's First Christmas: Celebrating Christmas with a 7 Week Old

I love celebrating Christmas (well, actually ALL major holidays if I'm being honest) about as much as Reg loves Katy Perry's Dark Horse. And judging from this little video, that's a lot of love... Hahaha! That will never get old!  Wait, where was I going with this again? Oh, right; Christmas.  I absolutely adore celebrating Christmas and I am so looking forward to sharing the magic of this season with Sawyer as he grows up! However, being that he was only 7 weeks old for his very first Christmas, it was hard not to get ahead of myself! Here are some of the fun ways we celebrated with Sawyer this year, not that he was awake for most of it... 1. First Christmas Ornament

When I was growing up, it was a Wharton family tradition that my siblings and I each got to choose a special new ornament to hang on the tree every year and I loved it! Reg and I have even carried over into our marriage and choose a new ornament together that in some way represents the previous year we shared! I definitely want to pass that tradition on to my own children and I can't think of a better time to start Sawyer's collection! I ordered his first ornament on Etsy a few days after he was born and I don't think it gets much more adorable than this! 

For funsies, here's the ornament Reg & I made together to commemorate 2015! What could better represent our year than the tiny and adorable handprint of our firstborn? 

2. Meeting Santa Claus

Obviously. Mall Santas are usually weird and smell like sour eggnog (and ours was no exception) but, hey, it's a must! 

We also saw Santa fly in on his T1 at Reg's squadron! (Minus the eggnog. FAA regulations and all.)

3. Art Projects I'm a lot like Martha Stewart, minus the jail time of course, in that I've always loved a good craft project. Might as well get used to paint on your feet now kid, because Mama's got a whole hand/footprint art Pinterest board with your name on it! 

4. Enjoying the Christmas Lights In the evenings we would lay beneath the tree and look up at the pretty, twinkling lights while listening to the soft sounds of 90's gangster rap (What? He's got good taste.) or Katy Perry if Reg was dj'ing, and the sweet expressions of pure wonder on Sawyer's face would make my heart explode with happiness. 

5. Shopping For Gifts As it turns out, babies couldn't care less if you buy their Christmas gifts right in front of them. I suppose technically they wouldn't care if you just didn't get them anything at all but that just seems so Grinchy; of course I was going to get him presents! To make things more fun, Reg and I agreed to each secretly purchase a few gifts for Sawyer and then we each unwrapped the other's presents to him on Christmas morning. 

6. Christmas Eve 'Jammies

Santa always makes an extra, early stop at the Williams' house to drop off a package with special Christmas Eve 'jammies and Sawyer was totally rocking his! 

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!  What fun holiday traditions does your family have? 

Our Greatest Adventure Yet

In the beginning of our relationship, when we were still just dating but we both knew we wanted more, Reg and I began making a list of things we wanted to experience together: adventures we wanted to have, places we wanted to go, things we wanted to see, and dreams we wanted to accomplish. Last year I presented Reg with an actual hardbound book of our Adventure List, as we lovingly dubbed it, as part of his gift for our first wedding anniversary. 

"Fitting," I thought, seeing as how the traditional gift for the first wedding anniversary is paper. Reg surprised me with a paper gift last year as well, in the form of tickets to a romantic weekend away in New York City.

As time has passed by we've added to our list and have even checked plenty of items off.  Among the adventures checked off thus far include: Skydiving

Riding an Airboat through the Everglades

Seeing a show on Broadway

Catching a Falcons game at the Dome

Taking a Hot Air Balloon ride

And so, so many more! 

Though we still have many more items left to check off, and we continure to add to our list fairly regularly, we're pretty excited about this next adventure that we're embarking on, and we think it just might be our most exhilarating adventure yet...

That's right, we're beginning the adventure of parenthood and we truly are perfectly and incandescently happy! I am so thankful to have such a special man to share my life with and I have no doubt that he is going to live up the honor of having the title "Daddy" in the most wonderful way!

Gender On Television: Is It Still A Boy's World?

Gender On Television: Is It Still A Boy’s World?

Jennifer B. Williams

Pensacola State College

February 23, 2015

Introduction

            Aside from providing the average American citizen anywhere between two and seven hours of information and entertainment daily, television is also a powerful and surreptitious agent of socialization, especially considering the media-rich world we now live in (Ferris & Stein, 2014). Through television we all subconsciously absorb messages and ideas about several aspects of our culture, including (but not limited to) race, gender, and perceived gender roles. Television has an especially great impact on children and tweens because they consume it while their identities are being formed, and has been shown to affect children’s early self-concepts and gendered behavior (Myers, 2013). Though it may be surprising to some given that it is, after all, the year 2015, previous research of popular 'tween' programming in America has indicated that gender inequality is still alive and well, with males outnumbering females in most television shows and stereotypical gender roles still being adhered to. In my research paper, I will examine popular 'tween' television shows for further evidence of gender inequality.

Review of the Literature

In their content analysis of the portrayed gender roles and stereotypes of tween television programming, Gerding and Signorielli set out to show that, in at least two main genres, it is still "a boy's world.' They hypothesized that males would outnumber females and that females would be presented more stereotypically than males, both in terms of attractiveness and in the portrayal of gender roles. In order to achieve their study they watched 49 episodes of 40 popular American tween television shows and coded them for variables, including the number of males vs. female characters and the gender role portrayal of characters in terms of appearance, behaviors, and personality traits. Gerding and Signorielli's results revealed that females were underrepresented in the Action-Adventure genre that is marketed towards a male audience, but that gender distribution was more even in the Teen-Scene genre that is geared towards a female audience. Also, overall, females in both genres were more attractive and aware of their looks, and also received more comments regarding their appearance than male characters.

In her study of popular tween television shows in America, Myers sought to show that, despite the success of the feminist movement, the prevailing underlying messages of popular programming remain anti- or post-feminist, meaning that they ostensibly support feminist messages but often undermined them in the end. Myers and a colleague systematically watched 45 total episodes of Disney and Nickelodeon Networks’ most popular tween-girl shows and coded them for variables including gender distribution of characters and anti-feminist messages through dialogue and body language. Her findings revealed that the programs all celebrated beauty and heterosexual coupling while demonizing strong and/or unattractive women. A regular and reoccurring message of the programming was that girls are more valuable if they are beautiful and desired by boys, and that girls must attract and attach themselves to boys in order to achieve status and satisfaction. The protagonist or lead female character would often “taken feminism into account,” while simultaneously dismissing the idea through words or actions. Myers also found that anti-feminist messages were being overtly broadcast in all analyzed programs at an alarming rate of every 2-3 minutes in a 22-minute program, making them hard to miss.

Research Method

            The following study is a contents analysis of an existing source, namely tween

television shows. I systematically watched and recorded data from eight episodes of three top-rated tween programs on the Disney and ABC Family networks. The shows analyzed in this research all fall under the ‘teen scene’ category and included three episodes of Disney Channel’s ‘Jessie,’ three episodes of Disney Channel’s ‘Girl Meets World,’ and two episodes of the parent show to ‘Girl Meets World,’ ABC Family’s ‘Boy Meets World.’ Although ‘Boy Meets World’ ended in the year 1998, it is still shown regularly throughout the week in syndication and has recently gained newfound popularity with today’s tween generation due to its immensely popular spin-off show, the aforementioned ‘Girl Meets World,’ which premiered last year.

            The variables I based my research on included keeping detailed notes on the gender distribution of the recurring cast members, the sex of the characters with speaking roles per episode, the sex of the main character of each show, and whether or not characters made or received comments about their body or appearance, as well as watching for gender role stereotypes. Aside from being interested in the results, seeing as how my husband and I are hoping to start our own family soon, I decided to study tween programming because I felt that it would be too easy to manipulate other genres of television; for instance, if I wanted to prove a hypothesis of gender equality, I could simply choose television shows with strong female leads, and vice versa. Not knowing anything about today’s children/tween programs may have removed any potential researcher bias.

Results and Findings

            As stated above, I viewed episodes from two tween programs on the Disney Channel and one on ABC Family. All of the television shows were of the ‘teen scene’ genre, which typically center around interpersonal relationships, romance, and generally less physically intense activities, and are marketed towards a female audience (Gerding & Signorielli, 2013). Although two thirds, or 67%, of the programs analyzed had a female lead, only 41% of the shows’ total recurring cast members were female. At 40%, a slightly lesser number of females had speaking roles. An unsurprising, though disheartening, 86% of comments regarding physical appearance were made or received by female characters, seeming to suggest that one of the most important ways for a girl or woman to receive attention is for outward beauty or the way they look. In short, females can do anything males can do, as long as they look pretty while they do it.

            Except, can they really? An especially unsettling observation I made in viewing these programs was the often-blatant stereotypes regarding gender roles. Supporting, or background, female characters were often pigeonholed in roles such as waitresses, maids, or the oft demonized, “strange” old neighbor next door, while male supporting characters were most often portrayed in affluent positions of authority, such as lawyers, talent agents, and college professors. In one episode of Disney Channel’s ‘Jessie,’ the title character made the decision to go back to college, however once she arrived to class her professor was male and disapproving of her and every single classmate was male, sending the subconscious and extremely negative message to young girls that higher education is not for them.

Conclusion

            At the start of this research I set out to prove that we still face gender inequality on television and, rather unfortunately, I was correct. Males vastly outnumber females both in terms of characters and speaking roles, sending the inherent message that males are more important (Gerding et al., 2013). Females are also oftentimes stereotyped according to perceived gender roles, which in turn feed the minds of the youth who consume these programs. It is said that television shows are a reflection of our culture, but an argument could also be formed to show that television may also be contributing to the creation of our culture. This research is important because television and mass media are increasingly becoming a prime socializing agent and viewers, particularly young ones, may be at risk for developing skewed conceptions about limiting gender roles.

REFERENCES

Ferris, K., Stein, J. (2014) The Real World: An Introduction to Sociology. New York, NY: Norton & Company.

Gerding, A. a., & Signorielli, N. (2014). Gender Roles in Tween Television Programming: A Content Analysis of Two Genres. Sex Roles, 70(1/2), 43-56.

Myers, K. k. (2013). Anti-feminist messages in American television programming for young girls. Journal Of Gender Studies, 22(2), 192-205.

*Note: This was a research paper I recently wrote for a Sociology class, which my professor then asked if she could use as an example in future classes. I decided to throw it up on my blog for a friend skeptical of gender inequality in these types of programs to peruse. Have you noticed any unsettling trends or patterns in television programs? Thanks for reading, and have a beautiful day! 

I'd Rather Have Four Quarters Than One Hundred Pennies

Maybe it's just me, but sometimes it seems like forming new, genuine friendships peaked in the sandbox and only gets harder the older you get. Or maybe that's just women. Occasionally though, you get lucky and meet someone that you instantly click with and your husbands joke that they can't tell your personalities apart. 
While Oxford Dictionary defines friendship as a relationship of mutual affection between two or more people, there's a little more breadth and depth than that. C.S. Lewis wrote that "Friendship is born at the exact moment one person says to another: 'What! You, too? I thought I was the only one!'" Turns out he was not the only one, because Plato wrote, "Similarity begets friendship" in his play, Phaedrus, which was written in 360 B.C. Aristotle also had the same idea, penning, "Some define it as a matter of similarity; they say that we love those who are like ourselves." How and why we make the friends we have has long been a subject of study in social psychology, and though the dynamics of friendship remain mysterious and unquantifiable, new research shows that the dance of new friendship is nuanced and far more complex that commonly thought. In an age dominated by social media, where you can "friend" someone without really being their friend, or even liking them for that matter, how do you form substantial friendships? 
While it is true that opposites can and do attract, more often than not birds of a feather flock together, meaning that we naturally gravitate towards people who have similar attitudes, values, interests, backgrounds, personalities and levels of attractiveness as ourselves. Sociologists and psychologists have been able to delineate the forces that attract and bind friends to each other, beginning from acquaintance to friend and elevating that friend to the coveted "best" position. 
1. Proximity In this context, proximity simply means how often people come in contact. Years ago, researchers conducted a study in which they followed the friendships in an apartment building. People tended to be friends with the neighbors on their respective floors, whereas friendship was least likely between someone on the first floor and someone on the second floor. However, those on the ground floor, near mailboxes and stairways, had friends on multiple floors. As the study suggests, friends are often those with whom we cross paths with regularity, such as coworkers, classmates, or people we bump into at the gym. Fortunately for me, as my two best friends live in North Carolina and Idaho, studies have shown that once a close friendship has been established, proximity has little effect on the ability to maintain a friendship. For instance, moving out of state is not the friendship death knell it once was, thanks largely to the web. 
2. Common Interests Why do we end up chatting with one person in our yoga class versus another? This answer is fairly self-evident: our friend-in-the-making loves Jane Austen, as do we, or is also still unabashedly in love with Disney World. They laugh at our jokes, and we laugh at theirs. In short, we have things in common.
3. History Nothing ties two people together, even people with little else in common, quite like having gone through the same difficult experience. Take, for instance, former members of breast cancer support groups whose diseases have been cured. Though the women no longer have breast cancer, their social identity as survivors often remains so powerful that their primary friendships are with other survivors because they can understand what they've gone through. Other major life events may include marriage, parenthood, or divorce. 
4. Common Values While sharing the same morals, values, and religious beliefs may not necessarily be enough to create a friendship on its own, if two people's core values are too divergent it may be difficult for their friendship to thrive. 
5. Personal Characteristics We tend to particularly like individuals who have admirable personality characteristics. As you may suspect, people most like those who exude positive characteristics, such as kindness, dependability, and trustworthiness, while disliking people with characteristics such as dishonesty, insincerity, and lack of personal warmth. Conversely, people who seem overly competent, or too perfect can make peers feel uncomfortable, while small mistakes make a person seem more human and therefore more likable. 
6. Equality In a true friendship, it stands to reason that there are going to be instances when you will lean on one another in times of hardship and difficulty. However, there must be balance. If one friend constantly needs the support of the other, such that the person being depended upon receives no benefit other than the opportunity to support and encourage, while the relationship indeed may be valuable, it can't be said to be a true friendship.
In essence, in this age of "collecting" friends on Facebook, finding authentic friendships is much more difficult than meets the eye. I myself have 580 "friends" on social media, but when it comes down to it I really have a handful of close friends I go on coffee-dates and catch up with and, aside from my husband, three very dear best friends. And I'm more than ok with that. As they say, quality over quantity, and I'd rather have four quarters than one hundred pennies. 
While the items I've listed above are really only the tip of the friendship iceberg, it's easy to see just how much goes into finding our kindred spirits. And while it's not necessarily an easy task, once you do find these people, they're like priceless gems. They're like coming home. 

Spring {Cleaning, That Is} Came Early!

Magazine articles and Pinterest links touting advice on how to organize your junk drawer always make me laugh; as though I only have one junk drawer. I always try my best to keep a clean home because I start to get bitchy cranky when it's a mess; true story, just ask Reg!  Everyone has heard the age-old saying: "A place for everything and everything in its place, unless you want me to poison your cupcakes." Or something like that.  However, even those of us with Type A personalities have at least a few areas that we're ashamed to shed light on; those places where life's odds & ends (or perhaps an excessive shoe collection) just sort of pile up - until now, that is! Spring came early to the Williams' house this year, or rather Spring cleaning did, and we spent this week putting together new shelves for the garage, reorganizing the junk drawers and cleaning out closets - oh, did I clean out closets!  It took a few hours, three $14 shoe racks from Walmart, twelve baskets for the top shelf and several trips to the local GoodWill to make donations, but I finally tamed the secret monster in our closet and transformed it from this...

to this...

I'm pretty pleased with the way it turned out. I'm even more pleased with the purge of old clothing I never wore, which means that now I get to go shopping for new clothes I'll never wear. Kidding. (Probably.)

But honestly, the best part is the fact that even though it may look like I still have too many shoes, Reg can't say a word about it because I'm not even the partner in this marriage with the excessive shoe collection...

Nope, I wasn't joking. 

Marriage ProTip: To avoid a lifetime of sighs, eye-rolls, and impatiently tapped feet, marry a man who a.) you love,  b.) treats you well, and c.) also enjoys shopping.  You can thank me later. 

Black Tulle & Leopard Is Never Not A Good Idea

As it turns out, when you get married, those regular date nights you and your beloved grew accustomed to aren't quite so regular anymore. It's not intentional, or even a necessarily bad thing. Maybe you just get swamped with homework.  Maybe your husband is exhausted after flying all week and working 12 hour days. Maybe it's because there's this thing called yoga pants, and those little bitches are irresistibly comfy. 
Whatever the reason, Reg and I had yet to make it out to dinner to celebrate the New Year, so last night I took matters into my own hands and met Reg at the door as he came home from work with my heels on, a kiss, and a "Get dressed, we're going out." 

Black tulle and leopard is never not a good idea. 

Coincidentally, he had secret plans of his own and, after making a quick stop after work, met me at the door, DVD in hand, with a movie he knew I'd been wanting to see which resulted in the dream date night: a lovely dinner out and yoga pants. 

Cactus Flower's legendary Santa Fe Chimi with cilantro rice: get in my life! 

Jack & Coke for him. Moscato D'Asti for me. Comfy pants for all. 

I kind of lucked out with this man. He's a keeper. 

As if that weren't enough excitement for one weekend, we're looking forward to a game night with dear friends this evening. Do you have any special weekend plans? 

It's Beginning To Look A Lot Less Like Christmas, And Other News

As I write this, it seems incredible to me that we're already at the end of the first week of the new year! I feel like we were literally just in Wichita, having the time of our lives for Christmas. Ok, maybe hanging out at Mom & Dad's, baking, playing board games, reliving old traditions and making new memories isn't everyone's idea of having the time of their life, but considering I hadn't been home in six months and have missed my family immensely, those two weeks were a godsend. 

Would definitely recommend flying next time, as opposed to that sixteen hour road trip, but I loved that Sundown got to come!

However, as they say, time waits for no one and here we are: January 7th and what a whirlwind of a year 2015 is already proving to be! 

This makes the third year in a row that Reg has managed to elude the dreaded chore of taking down Christmas decorations - I'm not even mad; just jealous! Nonetheless, I got everything down, packed away, and harassed Reg into storing everything in the attic (hey, it was the least he could do) by January 1st - a personal record! 

It's beginning to look a lot less like Christmas!

As much as I adore decorating for the holidays, there's something to be said for the peace and tranquility of a freshly cleaned and redecorated home once January rolls around. It's also the perfect time to revamp your style, which is how we ended up with a new dining room rug and bedroom comforter that I am in love with. 

Unless Reg is reading this, in which case they've always been there and he's just failed to notice them. Whew. That was close. 

In other news, as almost everyone who knows me knows, we had the pleasure of adopting our lab-mix, Sundown, a year ago (January 3rd, 2014 to be exact) and he's been the best, sweetest dog we could have hoped for. After pressuring Reg into it for forever, he finally relented, I mean, we came to the conclusion together that we would like to add another dog to our family and celebrated Sundown's adoption date this past weekend by rescuing this snuggle monster from a local shelter.

Meet Achilles, our newest fur-baby! His ears melt my heart.

But wait! We're actually a family of FIVE now. No, sorry, I'm not pregnant yet, we just also got Francis the fish this week! If you get the name reference, you, my fellow bookworm friend, are awesome. 

Other than that, it's pretty much an enchanted life as per usual down here. The new semester has begun and I've also created this blog. It's something I've been tossing around in my head for over a year now and I just never quite seemed to get around to it. I think a part of me was afraid to put myself out there, but then I came to an important realization: I don't have to care if someone else likes it or not. I'm not doing it for fame, or glory, or to please anybody else. I'm doing it because it's something I've wanted to do for myself. And right after I had this epiphany and published my first post, a favorite song by Francesca Battistelli came on the radio:

"He calls me chosen, free forgiven, wanted, child of the King,

His forever, held in treasure...

I am loved

I don't need my name in lights...

I'm famous in my Father's eyes..."

So, in an effort to live up to my New Year's "resolution," I'm spending my time intentionally and doing something meaningful to me. 

Thanks for stopping by for a visit! How's 2015 treating you so far?